Saturday, February 24, 2007

Flowering Kudzu



by Flowering Kudzu

I am a reject from the Pansi Files. Mrs. Weirsdo says that I don't really exist at all and don't belong with the original bunch of barbie dolls of the now disbanded 'Naked Gymnastics for Jesus' also called NG4J. She makes me feel like I am a weed that just crept onto the scene somehow. She called me a Trailer-Trash Barbie and seems to indicate that I didn't belong with the likes of Pansi.

I was named after a plant called Flowering Kudzu that grows on the ground over bare spots and you can cut it up and move it around and stuff like that. Just like the vine or whatever it is, I multiply fast and spread and have had about 24 or 25 kids. Also like the plant, I get torn apart a lot.

6 comments:

Hobbes said...

You are an invasive, clinging vine that was supposed to be useful but turned out to be a huge pest. No one can ever get rid of you, and you suffocate anything in your path. You shelter snakes, and the best thing that can be done with you, other than attacking you with weed killer, is to make jelly and tea with your blossoms.

Tom & Icy said...

And that was such a stroke of brilliance of you (Mrs. Wiersdo) to give the trailer-trash doll that name!

Anonymous said...

Icy, you can't correct your typos and misspelling in the comments, ha ha ha ha!

Hobbes said...

Thanks, T&I.

F. K.: If it's any consolation, April thinks you're beautiful, and she LOVES your name, even though she's sorry you kill trees.

Anonymous said...

Hey, I think you're pretty cute, Flowering Kudzu! I asked Lammy out and I thought she'd blown me off, but apparently there's some other guy going around the Netherworld using my name and she'd been with him. But I say you snooze you lose. How's about you and me go out sometime?

Anonymous said...

When you snooze you lose, and when you snore you lose more!